At Harper Therapy, we use the Relational Life Therapy (RLT) model for couples coaching and couples therapy. This model for working with couples is a fantastic framework. Working with relationships can be very complex work. It often requires more than just basic therapeutic skills.

A lot of pent-up emotion and frustration can build up for the average six years it takes for people to get the help they need. We see couples that are on their last leg here all the time. We are always asked if we can help them, and we tell them we can, but it will take work from both of them.

When we have been programmed through modeling to bring our baggage into our relationships, and then we wait on average six years to start getting help for it, that is going to take time to work through.

When it comes to relationships, we often do what we have seen our parents or guardians model in their relationships. This may be good, or this may be bad depending on the kind of relationship our parents have or had. If you grew up in a household where the relationship between your parents was explosive and volatile, you are most likely repeating that in your current relationships.

The length of time couples wait before seeking help can vary greatly depending on individual circumstances, cultural factors, and the nature of the relationship issues. However, research and anecdotal evidence suggest that couples often wait an average of six years from the onset of problems before seeking professional help.